So I started out this semester pretty crippling. I missed most of my classes only the third week in, because I started throwing up blood (I am totally fine now, thank goodness). I spent most of that week in and out of my surgeons office (because it was a complication of the surgery I had last year in November) and at home. I went out of town that following weekend (side note: I went to my first dragon con ever and it was SO fun, even though I wasn't 100% healthy)
So because of all of this shenanigans I missed a lot of materiel and fell behind. As any pharmacy student past or present knows, YOU DO NOT FALL BEHIND EVER IN YOUR SECOND YEAR!!!! I have been told time and time again that the second year of pharmacy school is essentially a lonely sleepless hell, and is the hardest year of school you will ever complete (as a PharmD that is)
The week I came back, I had my first test in Integrated Therapeutics I on a Thursday, followed by Immunology and Microbiology on Tuesday. So I studied hard every day for my IT test, leaving immunology for the weekend. Well this all was a huge mistake. I BARELY made a C on the IT test and I failed my Immunology test. As pretentious as this sounds, I am not the kind of person who fails a test.
So needless to say the professor from immunology made me come to his office and explain why I failed, and made me go over the previous test (that part I didn't mind). But then this professor proceeded to practally demand I miss other lectures (we have a mandatory attendance policy and these would be unexcused absences, and could effect my grades in those classes as well) to review objectives for the next test with them. When I responded I had lecture this professor's exact words were "You don't have my lecture." So now I am mad too because I think this person is a total jerk. Luckily I was able to join another student who was a friend of mine at a different time so I wouldn't have to miss class.
I made a B on my second Immunology test, and brought my grade up. Currently it is no where where I wanted it to be but a C is guaranteed and a B is possible.
Integrated therapeutics is a whole other story. I felt really confident before the test that I knew what I was doing, but during the test and after I was like wow, I may not know this stuff after all which totally sucked. Our grades haven't been released yet, but the class average was only a C so I don't have high hopes, which makes me really nervous.
I am kinda freaking out because there are all these programs, and scholarships and residencies that I want to apply for and I am REALLY worried my grades aren't nearly competitive enough. And I hate not feeling good enough which is smack dab in the middle of how I feel. This is awful for me because every mishap is devastating instead of just a simple ok do better next time. I really have to work on my mood. recently it has not been good. It could be do to exhaustion because god am I tired. I knew this wouldn't be easy but I feel like I am fighting a battle over here.
Well hopefully everything goes better than I forsee. Maybe I just need a better attitude :P
Stay Healthy Lovelies!
